I remember
by BeccaPotter1
Summary: It had It had been one very long year. Merlin seeks comfort from the one person he's lost a year after he lost them. One shot. Merlin/Freya
1. Chapter 1

**I Remember**

It had been one very long year. Merlin was walking down to the lake knowing that it was going to be a long night, for he had always known this day would come, and the grief he felt today showed. Arthur had eventually given Merlin the day off after he refused to respond to what was wrong. Not only that, he had been very polite that morning, so Arthur knew something was wrong.

Coming into the opening to the lake Merlin sighed and sat down, not hearing the person who crouched down behind a tree not far away.

'Freya, I miss you so much. We may not have known each other for long, but I know that I love you and I'm sure you felt the same way to.

'You're always in my dreams, and they're so real that I think of you always, and whenever I see strawberries I can't help but smile, thinking of the thick bread and the rose I conjured for you. I still remember your beautiful smile and your soft laughter as you told me that it wasn't a strawberry.' Merlin sighed, clearly thinking.

'I still remember holding you in my arms as you took your last breath. I remember the guilt you felt when I found out what you were. I remember the tears that fell from your perfect eyes because of that stab wound Arthur dealt you' Behind him there was a crack of a twig, but to immersed in what he was doing, Merlin didn't hear it. 'Mostly though, I remember where we were going to live. Somewhere with mountains, a few fields, a couple of cows, and a lake. I still dream of that idea, although, I know you are gone so it will never happen.

'I know you told me it is not my fault what that sorceress did to you, but I am still so sorry. I wish now, more than ever that you were here with me, for it has been one year already, and I miss you so much. You said I saved you by loving you, but that wasn't enough, you're not here now, in my presence, waiting for me to come home each night, or bring you the prince's food.' Silent tears caressed Merlin's red cheeks as he spoke. 'Out of everyone in this world, the only person I could truly be myself with is you. Gaius may have known of my power, but he got to many visitors, Arthur can't know yet incase he doesn't accept me, and then my destiny will fail, and my mother was always trying to protect me, stopping me using my magic; Will could never truly understand, for he was not in the same position, but you Freya, you may have been cursed, but I could be myself around you. We both had magic, and I could show you the best part of it. Not once since that day I made the flames of a candle dance again, for my memories of you come rushing back.

'Freya, I'm sorry I haven't returned before, but I couldn't forget this night one year ago with you lying in my arms.' Merlin stopped talking and just sat there. He ignored the crack of the twig behind him when he knew Arthur was leaving. Tonight his thoughts were on one person. Freya.

Merlin had sat there all night, and only moved when he saw the peaks of the mountains start to glisten from the sun rising. Finally he tore his bloodshot eyes away from the still lake and stumbled slowly back to Camelot.

'Merlin! There you are. Gaius and Arthur were looking for you last night, they were really worried. Apparently you weren't yourself yesterday, what was wrong?' Gwen ran and hugged Merlin before realising his cheeks were gleaming from the sun. 'Have you been crying Merlin?'

'I'm fine Gwen, really. I just needed to get out of Camelot for a bit yesterday. I must go get Arthur's breakfast.' Merlin walked away hoping not to get another confrontation on his way to Arthur's chambers.

'Ah Merlin, are you feeling better today?' The prince asked as his manservant walked into the room.

'Yes I am, thank you sire. I'm sorry about yesterday; I just needed to get out of the city for a bit.'

Merlin seemed like he was back to normal now, so Arthur would wait for the right moment to question him.

**AN hope you enjoy this fic. There is going to be a sequel showing Arthur and Merlins conversations. Please review. It makes me want to write more.**

**AlbusProngsRebeccaPotter**


	2. Authors Note

**AN Hey y'all,**

**I was wondering if you could review/message me any ideas so that I can write some more Merlin/Freya fics. I love the couple, but I need inspiration before I can write.**

**Thanks,**

**AlbusProngsRebeccaPotter**


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